Tuesday, December 28, 2021

Parenting Hit to Parenting Win

My daughter has been doing Kuk Sool Won™ for 8 months. In that time, she has tested twice. Both times she jumped up a full belt level. From white to yellow and then to blue. She has also competed in the World Championship and brought home two medals. Better yet, she has the skills to defend herself and it has really driven up her confidence and helped us focus on her health!

Kuk Sool Won™ TrainingKuk Sool Won™ Training

She has excitedly received a Student Textbook (quite the investment!) and we really enjoyed our travels together to the tournament. She is looking forward to her next tournament in a few months. So imagine my surprise when she told me she felt like she got herself into something and didn't know how to get out, that she wanted to "take a break" from Kuk Sool. I should have seen it coming, she's been getting belly or head aches right before class for weeks.

But I wasn't ready to just fold. Mind you, I hated Tae Kwon Do. But her experience with KSW is clearly very different than what I experienced in TKD decades ago. So I insisted she attend class that evening. Besides, they were board breaking - something she'd never even gotten to see before. And so she went, though we agreed to discuss the idea of "taking a break" when it wasn't time to get dressed and go. She struggled a bit, feeling scared to kick and hit the boards. But she also came home excited to have done it and to tell me all about it!

Once Spencer had gone to bed and she'd had a snack, I put an open spiral in front of her. One one page, I had her draw a smiley face. On the other, a frowning face. Then I had her write good things / bad things about Kuk Sool. And then we talked about what she'd written and I wrote my own entries lower down on the page. We talked about those, too. I made sure she knew that all of her points and feelings are valid. Yes, testing is hard. But how proud does she feel afterward with that new belt around her waist? She's incredible!

Kuk Sool Won™ Blue Belt Student with SBN and DBN
Blue Belt Earned

We also talked about how she feels like she's not good enough. That may be wrapped up in Kuk Sool, but is it's own issue apart from that, too. And we talked about that. In the end, she was happily on board with continuing in Kuk Sool. It needed to be her decision or at least a mutual one. I couldn't decide this for her. She's the one doing the work. I'm just supporting her. And I'd like to share with you that it was hard not to make it about the money. Because I just bought that book. I just worked off (barter) 4 months of classes for 2022. Yeah, the thought of all of that going out the window sucked. But she's worth more than any of that.

I took a parenting hit when she told me she wanted to take a break. But I made sure we had a calm space to discuss it and it became a parenting win! I am feeling really proud of myself! I hope you celebrate your wins, too!

If you're considering martial arts for your child, I highly recommend Kuk Sool Won™. Here is an exerpt from the World Kuk Sool Association Student Handbook that I think explains why I love KSW:

If children live with criticism, they learn to fight;
If children live with hostility, they learn to fight;
If children live with ridicule, they learn to be shy;
If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel guilty;
If children live with tolerance, they learn to be patient;
If children live with praise, they learn to appreciate;
If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence;
If children live with fairness, they learn justice;
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves;
If children live with both acceptance and friendship,
they learn to find love in the world.
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...