Day 132 - May 12
My preferred Mother's Day tradition: Park Day with the family...
with someone else behind the camera
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Mamatography 2013 - Week 20
My preferred Mother's Day tradition: Park Day with the family...
with someone else behind the camera
Friday, May 17, 2013
Transformative Parenting
Today I'm bringing you a guest post from a genius friend of mine all about a new kind of parenting course. Please welcome Paige! Scroll to the bottom for a short bio. The links below are my affiliate links, but I wouldn't share this information with you if I didn't support the program myself.
I don’t remember the exact moment I realized that gentle parenting was for me. The idea that “children are our future” touted in public didn’t seem to be practiced in reality.
In reality, putting children on the “naughty step” and letting them cry out for comfort without any emotional response from their parent seemed to be the best advice for living with children.
I just knew that felt wrong to me. Finding a community of other parents that believed the radical idea that children are people was so comforting. Here were other parents who were letting go of power and control and parenting from a place of love.
I’ve been very blessed to be part of this movement through Parenting Gently and the annual Carnival of Gentle Discipline. Getting the word out that there is another way to parent and that it works has been very rewarding.
I’ve also been humbled by the parents who come to me for advice on how to handle situations with their children in a gentle manner. I know how much these parents love their kids so to be trusted with helping them is really an honor.
Do you remember the first time you tried a gentle discipline technique and it worked? Did you have that aha moment?
Gentle parenting is kind of like a drug. That first hit is like “wow! I had no idea parenting could be this fun!” and then you’re hooked.
But, do you sometimes feel like you are still speaking a foreign language? That your initial reaction is always punitive and you have to translate or shift gears into “gentle” mode to react like you want?
Maybe in moments of stress you revert back to your old parenting paradigm and later you feel upset about they way you handled a situation?
Plus you might be getting naysayers from all sides telling you “you’re doing it wrong!”
Wouldn’t it be nice to have the gentle response be the first response that pops into your mind? So that without even thinking about it you can handle any issue in a peaceful manner? So that regardless of the opinion of others you feel confident in your choices?
The thing I realized about gentle parenting is that it isn’t just about gentle alternatives to punishment like spanking and time out.
Instead, it is a fundamental shift in how you relate to your kids. A fundamental shift in how you relate to everyone.
And a shift like that doesn’t come from constantly having to translate every situation into a gentle alternative. Sometimes, that can be even more stressful!
When you can find your own authentic voice and drive your parenting from the inside out, suddenly you’re not struggling to translate each situation into a gentle framework.
You find yourself connecting with your kids more and connecting with yourself more. You smile more and feel stressed out less.
Parenting is fun. Life is fun.
It is just pure awesomeness! I want everyone to experience this personal transformation!
What if I could help you look inside and find your own authentic parenting voice and use that to make your parenting choices?
I mean most of us aren’t parenting from deep inside of us. We are parenting on the fly as situations arise. Struggling with subconscious assumptions built on our own upbringing, our own personality and fears, and the silent societal messages about what parenting should be.
You can use alternatives to time out, spanking, or other punishment everyday and never find that comfortable, joyful parenting groove.
That groove that comes from parenting that is rooted in your own values and goals. After all the best parenting is your own authentic parenting.
This is why I’m so excited to be partnering with Everyday Feminism to offer the first ever Transformative Parenting: Finding Your Authentic Parenting Voice online course.
Everyday Feminism is all about transforming your life through feminism and that fits just perfectly with this idea that through self-transformation we can become the best parents we can be.
This online course won’t be hitting you on the head with feminist theory or with gentle parenting doctrine. You don’t need more external lists of do’s and don'ts.
Instead I will walk you through a process of self-exploration that will help you align your parenting choices with your deepest core values.
We’ll look at:
I don’t remember the exact moment I realized that gentle parenting was for me. The idea that “children are our future” touted in public didn’t seem to be practiced in reality.
In reality, putting children on the “naughty step” and letting them cry out for comfort without any emotional response from their parent seemed to be the best advice for living with children.
I just knew that felt wrong to me. Finding a community of other parents that believed the radical idea that children are people was so comforting. Here were other parents who were letting go of power and control and parenting from a place of love.
I’ve been very blessed to be part of this movement through Parenting Gently and the annual Carnival of Gentle Discipline. Getting the word out that there is another way to parent and that it works has been very rewarding.
I’ve also been humbled by the parents who come to me for advice on how to handle situations with their children in a gentle manner. I know how much these parents love their kids so to be trusted with helping them is really an honor.
Do you remember the first time you tried a gentle discipline technique and it worked? Did you have that aha moment?
Gentle parenting is kind of like a drug. That first hit is like “wow! I had no idea parenting could be this fun!” and then you’re hooked.
But, do you sometimes feel like you are still speaking a foreign language? That your initial reaction is always punitive and you have to translate or shift gears into “gentle” mode to react like you want?
Maybe in moments of stress you revert back to your old parenting paradigm and later you feel upset about they way you handled a situation?
Plus you might be getting naysayers from all sides telling you “you’re doing it wrong!”
Wouldn’t it be nice to have the gentle response be the first response that pops into your mind? So that without even thinking about it you can handle any issue in a peaceful manner? So that regardless of the opinion of others you feel confident in your choices?
The thing I realized about gentle parenting is that it isn’t just about gentle alternatives to punishment like spanking and time out.
Instead, it is a fundamental shift in how you relate to your kids. A fundamental shift in how you relate to everyone.
And a shift like that doesn’t come from constantly having to translate every situation into a gentle alternative. Sometimes, that can be even more stressful!
When you can find your own authentic voice and drive your parenting from the inside out, suddenly you’re not struggling to translate each situation into a gentle framework.
You find yourself connecting with your kids more and connecting with yourself more. You smile more and feel stressed out less.
Parenting is fun. Life is fun.
It is just pure awesomeness! I want everyone to experience this personal transformation!
What if I could help you look inside and find your own authentic parenting voice and use that to make your parenting choices?
I mean most of us aren’t parenting from deep inside of us. We are parenting on the fly as situations arise. Struggling with subconscious assumptions built on our own upbringing, our own personality and fears, and the silent societal messages about what parenting should be.
You can use alternatives to time out, spanking, or other punishment everyday and never find that comfortable, joyful parenting groove.
That groove that comes from parenting that is rooted in your own values and goals. After all the best parenting is your own authentic parenting.
This is why I’m so excited to be partnering with Everyday Feminism to offer the first ever Transformative Parenting: Finding Your Authentic Parenting Voice online course.Everyday Feminism is all about transforming your life through feminism and that fits just perfectly with this idea that through self-transformation we can become the best parents we can be.
This online course won’t be hitting you on the head with feminist theory or with gentle parenting doctrine. You don’t need more external lists of do’s and don'ts.
Instead I will walk you through a process of self-exploration that will help you align your parenting choices with your deepest core values.
We’ll look at:
- The cultural messages we receive and internalize about parenthood
- How our upbringing and personality shape our parenting
- How to break out of the cycle of parenting from a place of fear
- Finding your own core values and goals for your children and translate them into daily action
- How to communicate with compassion even in times of conflict
- How to work with your feelings and needs and help your children do the same
- And more!
All in a supportive community of fellow parents who want to break the old habits of parenting we see in our society and forge new, connected bonds with our kids.
I know that parenting is a busy task. I’ll use several different methods of delivery so you can find what works best for you. Each lesson should only take 1-2 hours a week and not all at once!
So you can break it up to fit your schedule.
I hope you’ll join me! You won’t regret the time spent on your own self-improvement and you will notice a profound change in your daily life with your kids.
Paige Lucas-Stannard blogs about infertility, parenting, and women’s issues at Baby Dust Diaries as well as being the founder of the gentle discipline site Parenting Gently and co-founder of the breastfeeding rights site Nursing Freedom. She likes to cook and sew and has, in general, become her mother. Happily. Follow her on Twitter @babydust.
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Mamatography 2013 - Week 19
Day 125 - May 5
Sasha loves when we have company.
Despite not knowing Tami, she greeted her with a hug and an "I love you!"
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Prepared... or not?
Welcome to the May 2013 Carnival of Natural Parenting: Emergency Preparedness
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month our participants have shared their plans to keep their families safe. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.
***
We live in Oklahoma; Tornado Alley. We've had floods (including flash floods), tornadoes, earthquakes and snow / ice storms. We get some advanced warning (or "watch") for some of these. We know when a storm is coming that is likely to bring on tornadoes. We know when a nasty snow storm is coming. And people GO. NUTS. If you go to the store, you will find them sold out of water, bread, canned goods... you get the idea. "Its the apocalypse!"
Us... not so much. We are very fly-by-the-seat-of-our-pants kind of people. We even hesitate to commit to social gatherings. And so cometh the weather.
The red truck is us. You see the car next to us? Completely covered in snow drift!
See the car in front of the truck (above)?
It was propped up like this for several days, blocking us from leaving.
We walked to the nearest convenience store, the only thing close-by at all. We were terribly lucky that they were even open! Maybe I'm just lucky? I never buy canned goods or water in advance to prepare for anything! I suppose I set a really bad example here, but we just don't plan ahead like that.
I do want to buy a storm radio, since we don't have television service. Do you prepare for bad weather?
***
Visit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!
Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month our participants have shared their plans to keep their families safe. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.
***
We live in Oklahoma; Tornado Alley. We've had floods (including flash floods), tornadoes, earthquakes and snow / ice storms. We get some advanced warning (or "watch") for some of these. We know when a storm is coming that is likely to bring on tornadoes. We know when a nasty snow storm is coming. And people GO. NUTS. If you go to the store, you will find them sold out of water, bread, canned goods... you get the idea. "Its the apocalypse!"
Us... not so much. We are very fly-by-the-seat-of-our-pants kind of people. We even hesitate to commit to social gatherings. And so cometh the weather.
The red truck is us. You see the car next to us? Completely covered in snow drift!
See the car in front of the truck (above)?
It was propped up like this for several days, blocking us from leaving.
We walked to the nearest convenience store, the only thing close-by at all. We were terribly lucky that they were even open! Maybe I'm just lucky? I never buy canned goods or water in advance to prepare for anything! I suppose I set a really bad example here, but we just don't plan ahead like that.
I do want to buy a storm radio, since we don't have television service. Do you prepare for bad weather?
***
Visit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:
- Be Prepared for Emergencies — Becky at Crafty Garden Mama is reviewing Angela England's new ebook, The Untrained Housewife's Guide to Getting Prepared. See what measures she is learning to adopt in her family.
- Prepare to Expect a Safe and Beautiful Natural Birth — What do you need to have prepared so that you can have a nice and relaxing birth at home? Lisa at The Squishable Baby shares her list in a guest post at Natural Parents Network.
- Fire Boxes for Emergency Preparedness — Jana of Jananas tells why she bought a fire box to store important documents and what is stored in the box.
- Firefighter Training Homeschool Curriculum — Kellie at Our Mindful Life helped her homeschooled kids prepare for emergencies through a Firefighter Training unit.
- 3 Secrets to a Royal Emergency — Jaye Anne at Wide Awake, Half Asleep tells the secret to living like kings during a storm-induced power outage.
- Is Your Family Prepared for an Emergency? — Chrystal at Happy Mothering shares an overview of what her family has done to become more prepared for emergencies.
- What to Do in an Earthquake — Julia at A Little Bit of All of It gives instructions for staying safe in the event of an earthquake as well as tips for teaching your children to keep safe and where to find information online after an earthquake.
- Spring Cleaning & Preparing, Part 2 — Justine at The Lone Home Ranger organizes and replenishes her emergency supply every spring and is learning to add to the food stockpile by preserving year-round.
- 15 Must-Haves For The Natural Minded Family When Disaster or Emergency Strikes — Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama shares how she prepares for disaster or an emergency as a natural minded mama. Learn what 15 natural items you should consider having on hand!
- Emergency Preparedness: Cosleeping, Cheezits, Chocolate — Kristine at All the Things in the World was happy to have cosleeping in her emergency tool kit during Hurricane Sandy.
- Being Prepared For Personal Disasters — Luschka at Diary of a First Child draws on her own recent experiences and considers five things every parent should have in place to ease the burden when sudden disaster strikes.
- The Natural Emergency Kit That I Always Carry in My Diaper Bag — Charise at I Thought I Knew Mama shares the four green and natural items in her emergency kit that she can't do without when she's out and about with her little ones.
- Prepared... or not? — Is it dangerous to not prepare? Jorje of Momma Jorje shares whether her family prepares…or not.
- Pack a car safety kit: 25 must-have items for emergencies — Whether you're out for a leisurely drive or fleeing a disaster, Lauren at Hobo Mama offers tips on stocking your car with emergency supplies that will tide you over if you're stranded.
- Teaching My Children About Tornados — Destany at They Are All of Me writes about preparing her children for tornado season.
- Preparing our children for emergencies — Preparing for emergencies means preparing your children, and Robbie at Going Green Mama shares ways on how to empower kids when it comes to emergencies.
- Emergency Preparedness in Sub-Saharan Africa — After living in Sub-Saharan Africa for 7 years, emergency preparedness is not just a concept any more to Laura from Authentic Parenting.
- Five Ideas to Keep Babies and Toddlers Safe from Choking — Do you have a baby or toddler who likes to put everything (and I mean *everything*) in her mouth? Dionna at Code Name: Mama does, and today she's sharing a story and some tips on how to keep your little ones safe from choking.
Monday, May 13, 2013
May Taboo Carnival Call for Submissions
Jorje from Momma Jorje and Jennifer from Hybrid Rasta Mama are pleased to announce The Taboo Carnival. This Carnival will be held four times yearly (February, May, August, and November). The topics will be wide and varied but focused on subjects that are typically not discussed in the natural parenting/mindful living world of bloggers.
Any parent will tell you that life after children is much, much different than life before children. As well it should be. After all, you are entrusted with the life of another human being and are no longer making decisions based on your own personal whims and desires. There are millions of little details to take into account for even the simplest of tasks…like going grocery shopping. And gone are the days of dropping everything, packing an overnight bag, and taking a girl’s trip to the City!
This month’s Carnival was created to liberate you and to allow you to openly discuss your true feelings about how motherhood has flipped your world upside down. While this topic might seem rather broad, we would like to offer some suggestions for post topics:
Remember, these are just our thoughts and idea to get your creative juices flowing. You are welcome to write about anything related to not always liking your child.
We understand that some of these topics might be sensitive or too personal to share on your own blog. Therefore, we will have a “post swap” option where another blogger will host your post anonymously and you in turn will host another blogger’s post. We will handle all of the details of the post trade once we receive your submission. The host blogger will never know who wrote the post.
Fill out the webform (at the bottom of this post) and email your submission to jorje {at} mommajorje{dot}com AND jennifer {at} hybridrastamama {dot}com by 11:59 p.m. Pacific time.
Before you post, we will send you an email with a little blurb in html to paste into your submission that will introduce the carnival. You will publish your post on May 28th before 8am PST and email us the link if you haven’t done so already. Once everyone’s posts are published, we will send out a finalized list of all the participants’ links to generate lots of link love for your site. We’ll include full instructions in the email we send before the posting date.
A few housekeeping items:
• Please write a new, previously unpublished post for the carnival.
• We will email you with specific instructions on posting before carnival day.
• Please do not post your article until the carnival date.
• We reserve the right to accept submissions based on relevance to the topic and quality of writing.
• Please refrain from using profanity, poor spelling and grammar, and vicious personal attacks.
• We will NOT be editing your post so please proofread and run a spelling and grammar check.
If you have any questions, you are welcome to contact us via email!
Copy the Taboo Carnival badge and add it to your sidebar:
We are so looking forward to reading all the contributions for the Carnival!
The May Taboo Carnival topic is: “I Miss My Life”
Any parent will tell you that life after children is much, much different than life before children. As well it should be. After all, you are entrusted with the life of another human being and are no longer making decisions based on your own personal whims and desires. There are millions of little details to take into account for even the simplest of tasks…like going grocery shopping. And gone are the days of dropping everything, packing an overnight bag, and taking a girl’s trip to the City!
This month’s Carnival was created to liberate you and to allow you to openly discuss your true feelings about how motherhood has flipped your world upside down. While this topic might seem rather broad, we would like to offer some suggestions for post topics:
- What do you miss most about your life before having children? Anything in particular or is it broader than one or two things?
- Do you regret not doing something in particular before having children?
- Do you ever get jealous of your single, childless friends? Why? What makes their life so much more attractive to you?
- How do you FEEL about missing parts of your life pre-children? Do you feel guilt over it? Do you embrace it as normal? How do you cope with your feelings around this?
- Have you ever admitted that you miss your pre-child life or that you are jealous of your non-mama friends? What reaction did you receive?
Remember, these are just our thoughts and idea to get your creative juices flowing. You are welcome to write about anything related to not always liking your child.
We understand that some of these topics might be sensitive or too personal to share on your own blog. Therefore, we will have a “post swap” option where another blogger will host your post anonymously and you in turn will host another blogger’s post. We will handle all of the details of the post trade once we receive your submission. The host blogger will never know who wrote the post.
Submissions Deadline: Thursday, May 23, 2013.
Fill out the webform (at the bottom of this post) and email your submission to jorje {at} mommajorje{dot}com AND jennifer {at} hybridrastamama {dot}com by 11:59 p.m. Pacific time.
Carnival date: Tuesday, May 28, 2012.
Before you post, we will send you an email with a little blurb in html to paste into your submission that will introduce the carnival. You will publish your post on May 28th before 8am PST and email us the link if you haven’t done so already. Once everyone’s posts are published, we will send out a finalized list of all the participants’ links to generate lots of link love for your site. We’ll include full instructions in the email we send before the posting date.
A few housekeeping items:
• Please write a new, previously unpublished post for the carnival.
• We will email you with specific instructions on posting before carnival day.
• Please do not post your article until the carnival date.
• We reserve the right to accept submissions based on relevance to the topic and quality of writing.
• Please refrain from using profanity, poor spelling and grammar, and vicious personal attacks.
• We will NOT be editing your post so please proofread and run a spelling and grammar check.
If you have any questions, you are welcome to contact us via email!
Copy the Taboo Carnival badge and add it to your sidebar:
To stay connected:
- Subscribe to Momma Jorje via RSS feed
- Subscribe to Hybrid Rasta Mama via RSS and/or email
- Like Momma Jorje and Hybrid Rasta Mama on Facebook
We are so looking forward to reading all the contributions for the Carnival!
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Giveaway: Organic Boba Carrier 3G – $160 ARV {5.25; US}
This is a joint giveaway with Momma Jorje and Natural Parents Network. You may enter at one site only. Please find the section marked "Win it!" for the mandatory entry and optional bonus entries.This is a giveaway from Boba, a baby carrier company which is offering our readers a giveaway of an Organic Boba Carrier 3G, a value of $160.
The Boba Carrier may be converted to a newborn carrier without an infant insert or any additional items and used well into toddlerhood. This carrier can be used for children ranging in size from 7-45 pounds!
My Organic Boba Carrier 3G arrived, neatly folded in a pretty box with a full color instruction manual including step-by-step photographs (also available online). This photo does not do the colors justice.
It is a beautiful carrier.
The carrier has several different adjustments you can make, but it wasn't overwhelming. It only took a few minutes to have it on and ready to load with a child. You'll want help the first few times you load a baby on your back, but with practice I mastered loading a back carry alone.
Spencer was cozy back there. He could get his hands up and out to play with my hair, have them go through the straps or just tuck them in close to his body. The carrier totally supports his body. His legs were higher than his bum (it is not a "crotch dangler.")
This photo from the Boba site shows the colors better as well as a front carry. According to their manual, this carry is fine from 15-30 pounds. You see how these two are face-to-face? I found that even carrying Spencer (20 pounds, remember), he was too tall. I had to look around his head and would also hit my chin on him.
The back carry is for children from 20-45 pounds. I love that there is overlap there, so you can use it with whichever carry is right for you.
The Boba will also work as a Newborn Carrier (7-15 pounds) by snapping the bottom (no attachments or inserts necessary). It works great as a newborn carrier, but I don't like the snap placement when I carry Spencer because he winds up with these little circle indentations on his legs. This may not be an issue if you keep your baby clothed, but I tend to give him lots of naked time. (Wearing a naked baby is a great way to hone your Elimination Communication skills.)
I've used hiking backpacks, ring slings, mei tais and other carriers. This is absolutely my favorite carrier. I loved my wrap for Spencer when he was a newborn, but the Boba 3G is so versatile, holding babies from 7-45 pounds!
Boba Inc. is a group of dedicated people all working together to support babywearing, family travel, alternative learning, natural parenting, and other practices of secure bonding and attachment so that every parent can deepen their conscious understanding and appreciation of their relationship with their children. We recognize that there is no single formula to meet each particular child’s individual challenges and respect a mother’s innate ability to trust and know what is right for her own.If that doesn't sound like a very "Natural Parents Network" kind of company, I don't know what does! The company supports a lot of organizations that support natural parenting ideals (including Attachment Parenting International, among others).
BUY IT!
You can purchase your own Organic Boba Carrier 3G at Boba for $160. There are 3 different organic fabric combinations or you can choose from adorable prints if you don't choose organic. Boba's other soft structured carriers range in price from $120 to $125, and they have wraps from $38 to $60. You can also find Boba carriers on Amazon.WIN IT!
For your own chance to win an Organic Boba Carrier 3G, enter by leaving a comment and using our Rafflecopter system below.The winner will receive an Organic Boba Carrier 3G. Contest is open to residents of the US only.
MANDATORY ENTRY: Visit Boba and tell us one thing you have learned about the company! You must enter your name and email address in the Rafflecopter entry system for your entry to count, after leaving a comment on this blog post.Leave a valid email address so we can contact you if you win. Email addresses in Rafflecopter are not made publicly visible. Please leave the same valid email address in your mandatory comment so we can verify entries.
This is a joint giveaway with Momma Jorje and Natural Parents Network. You may enter at one site only, and we'll be recording IP addresses to ensure that there are no duplicate entries. That said, please do visit and enjoy both sites!
BONUS ENTRIES:
See the Rafflecopter entry system for bonus entries to increase your chance of winning after completing the mandatory entry. All bonus entries are entered directly into Rafflecopter. Give it a try, and email or leave a comment if you have any questions!
Thursday, May 9, 2013
Monster Smoothie
Welcome to the Festival of Food Carnival. This month, we celebrate foods with kid-appeal! Hosted by Diary of a First Child and Hybrid Rasta Mama, you're welcome to join us next time, or if you have a previously published recipe you'd like to share, add it to the linky below.
This is my variation on a recipe my mother originally found in the local paper. I think children can help with most recipes if we just let them. I often have a hard time with the patience for it, but it is so worth the effort! This one is easy because its just a matter of throwing ingredients into the bowl (or blender pitcher) and the amounts are really flexible.
2-3 Cups of spinach
I don't know about you, but I have no idea how much to cram spinach into a cup to measure it. So... I just use a LOT of spinach!
This is my variation on a recipe my mother originally found in the local paper. I think children can help with most recipes if we just let them. I often have a hard time with the patience for it, but it is so worth the effort! This one is easy because its just a matter of throwing ingredients into the bowl (or blender pitcher) and the amounts are really flexible.
2-3 Cups of spinach
I don't know about you, but I have no idea how much to cram spinach into a cup to measure it. So... I just use a LOT of spinach!
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