Friday, September 7, 2012

When they gotta go...


Welcome to the second edition of the "I'm a Natural Parent - BUT..." Carnival

This post was written for inclusion in the carnival hosted by The Artful Mama and our feminist {play}school. During this carnival our participants have focused on how mainstream society has affected their natural parenting and how they have come to peace with this.

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Our Elimination Communication journey with Spencer has been amazing! I love it! I do get annoyed for night time EC, though. Once we found our groove during the day, he started insisting on being pottied at night, even when he doesn't actually want to go. He can't settle or stay asleep when he needs to go. He will toss and turn and fidget before eventually peeing in the bed. His wiggling is enough to wake me.

I figured all this out because he would wiggle, I would nurse him "back to sleep" and put him back down. Just as I would doze back off, he would start to wiggle again. It wasn't milk he needed, it was an empty bladder.

Here is how it plays out these days: wriggle, toss, turn, then my sudden realization that if I don't take him to potty he will pee all over myself and the bed. Sometimes I let him nurse a bit before taking him to the sink. At the sink, he slumps down, asleep. Or he fusses. But with some water running, maybe even a toe dipped into some cool water, he pees. Then he nurses. Oh, but don't count this boy out just yet! He needs to pee again! And nurse again... then, and only then, can he settle back in to sleep.

And if I don't wake up enough in time? If he has to wake completely up for this process, he thinks it is time to be up and active! I basically have to wait an hour before he will go back to sleep.

This is a solid enough routine that I do actually let him sleep naked. Around 5 in the morning, I put on his diaper. I'm not the quickest to wake for that actual morning time and he doesn't really wriggle when he wakes for the day. He just lies there, happy, and pees.

I do "fair to midland" at catching during the day. Some days he can stay naked and I catch nearly every pee. Other days I am just not on top of it and he has to wear a diaper. I still try to catch, but it is good to have the back up.

When we go out, he always wears a diaper. Still, if I offer a pottytunity when we arrive and/or leave each destination, we do very well. But then you have doctor appointments. I recently took Spencer for his cardiology appointment. It always lasts 1-2 hours. He was asleep when we arrived, so I just carried him into the building (rather than letting him pee in the parking lot).

swaddled for infant EKG
Spencer, swaddled for his EKG in April.
I prefer the guy that lets him wiggle.

It took a little effort to get him to stay still for his EKG. Then it hit me - he needs to pee. I won't generally take him while we're at an appointment. I try to think of it like Sasha needing to pee. Their need to empty their bladders are no different, he just has more fabric between his legs. I did take Spencer between the EKG and the next part of our appointment, but I should have taken him sooner.

If that had been a 3yo wriggling through an EKG, I am sure I would have asked for a potty break. But because Spencer was wearing a diaper, I didn't. I'm trying to get better about it - it is a constant thing, right? We're always striving to be better parents.

Do you have any places or people around whom you let some part of your parenting slide?


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I'm a Natural Parent — But … Blog CarnivalThis carnival was created by The Artful Mama and Natural Parents Network. We recognize that "natural parenting" means different things to different families, and we are dedicated to providing a safe place for all families, regardless of where they are in their parenting journeys.

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