Tuesday, September 9, 2014

To Minimalist and Back Again

Welcome to the September 2014 Carnival of Natural Parenting: Home Tour

This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month our participants have opened up their doors and given us a photo-rich glimpse into how they arrange their living spaces.




I wrote in October 2011 (for the Carnival of Natural Parenting, actually!) about how we minimized from a spacious 3 bedroom condo down to a 2 bedroom apartment and, soon after, into a 1 bedroom apartment. At that time, we were planning our next move, which was into a 10 x 10 bedroom and an attic room for the teen. That was our entire living space, which we rented from friends. A couple of months after Spencer was born, we took the next plunge: We bought and moved our family of five into a 200 square foot travel trailer. Wow. For real.


In hindsight, yes, I think I may have taken things a little too far. We did feel the need to make that next move and it was what worked for us at the time, but spending Summer in a tin can in a slot with no shade... it was harsh. Otherwise, we rather liked our RV park. We used our shower as a space to stack drawers for Ronni and just used the shower facilities on site. The coolest thing about that was using the handicap accessible shower to have my husband's help bathing the littles. I loved our "Family Showers."


Our next move was into a government subsidized neighborhood... it was a very cute home. It was 2 stories, 3 bedrooms, 2½ baths. Holy cow! We didn't even have this much space in the condo! We loved our space, though I had trouble with the stairs. This was also when Spencer's sleep issues surfaced, so he and I started sleeping downstairs. We also started over with basically zero furniture. All we had was mattresses and a desk plus kitchen stuff. The place looked very minimalist at first! But with lots of space... its like the stuff just follows.


Now we've moved into a modest house (I love not sharing walls with neighbors!) with 2 bedrooms. This is more our size, though we're still a little cramped. Sasha and Ronni (about to turn 5 and 16 years old) share a bedroom, which holds a bunk bed and a full size bed. We share our bedroom with Spencer, using queen and twin beds. Somehow... we've amassed so much stuff! Again! I wouldn't say it compares with living in one place for years, but considering I have been a self-proclaimed minimalist, its a lot of stuff.

And I guess that is the moral of my story. Its difficult to up-size your space without upping the amount of stuff you have. It has been amazing to have our own fenced in yard, though! I would say that is probably the biggest plus of our current home. I've been able to garden and Sasha has gotten SO much more time playing outside, which is something I very much wanted for her. We still dream of hitting the road, I think I just jumped the gun a bit.

I'm not sure I can still call myself a minimalist.

Have you made drastic changes to the size of your homes?
How has that changed the amount of stuff you had?




Carnival of Natural Parenting -- Hobo Mama and Code Name: MamaVisit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

  • Being Barlow Home Tour — Follow along as Jessica at Being Barlow gives you the tour of her family's home.
  • A Tour Of My Hybrid Rasta Kitchen — Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama takes you on a tour of her kitchen complete with a Kombucha Corner, a large turtle, her tea stash, and of course, all her must-have kitchen gadgets. Check out Hybrid Rasta Mama's most favorite space!
  • Dreaming of a Sisters Room — Bianca, The Pierogie Mama, dreams, schemes and pins ideas for when her younger daughter is ready to move out of the family bed and share a room with her older sister.
  • Building a life — Constructing a dream — Survivor at Surviving Mexico-Adventures and Disasters shows you a glimpse inside the home her family built and talks about adaptions they made in constructing their lives in Mexico.
  • Why I'm Sleeping in the Dining Room — Becca at The Earthling's Handbook welcomed a new baby but didn't have a spare bedroom. She explains how her family rearranged the house to create Lydia's nursing nest and changing room in spaces they already had.
  • The Gratitude Tour — Inspired by Momastry's recent "home tour," That Mama Gretchen is highlighting imperfect snapshots of things she's thankful for around her home. Don't plan to pin anything!
  • Our Home in the Forest — Tara from Up the Dempster gives you a peek into life lived off-grid in Canada's Yukon Territory.
  • natural bedding for kids — Emma at Your Fonder Heart shows you how her family of 3 (soon to be 4) manages to keep their two cotton & wool beds clean and dry (plus a little on the end of cosleeping — for now).
  • I love our home — ANonyMous at Radical Ramblings explains how lucky she feels to have the home she does, and why she strives so hard to keep it tidy.
  • Not-So-Extreme Makeover: Sunshine and Rainbows Edition — Dionna at Code Name: Mama was tired of her dark, outdated house, so she brightened it up and added some color.
  • Our little outdoor space — Tat at Mum in search invites you to visit her balcony, where her children make friends with wildlife.
  • Our Funky, Bright, Eclectic, Montessori Home — Rachel at Bread and Roses shows you her family's newly renovated home and how it's set up with Montessori principles in mind for her 15-month-old to have independence.
  • Beach cottage in progress — Ever tried to turn a 1980s condo into a 1920s beach bungalow? Lauren at Hobo Mama is giving it a try!
  • Conjuring home: intention in renovation — Jessica at Crunchy-Chewy Mama explains why she and her husband took on a huge renovation with two little kids and shares the downsides and the ups, too.
  • Learning At Home — Kerry at City Kids Homeschooling helps us to re-imagine the ordinary spaces of our homes to ignite natural learning.
  • My Dining Room Table — Kellie at Our Mindful Life loves her dining room table — and everything surrounding it!
  • Sight words and life lessons — The room that seemed to fit the least in Laura from Pug in the Kitchen's life is now host to her family's homeschool adventures and a room they couldn't imagine life without!
  • A Tour of Our Church — Garry at Postilius invites you virtually visit him in the 19th-century, one-room church where he lives with his spouse and two kids.
  • Preparing a Montessori Baby-Toddler Space at Home — Deb Chitwood at Living Montessori Now shares the Montessori baby-toddler space she's created in the main living area of her home along with a variety of resources for creating a Montessori-friendly home.
  • The Old Bailey House — Come peek through the window of The Old Bailey House where Erica at ChildOrganics resides with her little ones.
  • My New House Not-Monday: The Stairs — Claire at The Adventures of Lactating Girl shows you her new laminate stairs in her not-so-new-anymore house.
  • To Minimalist and Back Again — Jorje of Momma Jorje shares how she went to the extreme as a minimalist and bounced right back. Read how she finds it difficult to maintain the minimalist lifestyle when upsizing living space.
  • Our Life As Modern-Day Nomads — This family of five lives in 194 square feet of space — with the whole of North America as a back yard. Paige of Our Road Less Traveled guest posts at Natural Parents Network.

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Which comes first, social skills or social life?


Welcome to the August 2014 Carnival of Natural Parenting: Friends

This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama. This month our participants have shared stories and wisdom about friends.




How do you teach a preschooler to be a friend that others want to have? I mean, our daughter is nearly 5. She only rarely uses her manners without being reminded. I realize that most kids don't really care about manners, but... she cries and screams on occasion. She cried at our unschooling coop last week because a girl wouldn't let her play with a toy that was special to her. She cries and screams when its time to leave an event that includes other children. I try to give her a countdown, I try to soothe her. None of it makes much difference. It seems like the only thing that helps is if we have something exciting to go do afterward, especially with a friend. That can't happen every time, its not possible. You have to go home eventually!

There is one girl that she thinks of as her best friend. I would like her mother to become my new BFF as well. They are the most peaceful people I have ever met! But the little girl doesn't want to play with Sasha... not until she moves past her "loud phase." It breaks my heart - for both of us. Sasha asks me, often, when we're going back to her house. How do I help her understand? How do I help her learn from this? She's never been terribly empathetic or even sympathetic to others, so there's that hindrance as well. Its only been recently that she even started to notice if I'm crying.


Ronni had a "bestie" by the time he was 2.
Perhaps getting an extra early start helped.

All that said, I think she's just still at a phase where her emotions are bigger than she can manage. And when they hit her - she lets the world know! There are a couple of other girls in our circle close in age that are equally emotional (and loud). This helps me to realize and recognize that she is at a "normal" stage of development. I want to support her expressing her emotions, but... I also don't want her to be a friendless outcast. The screaming isn't pleasant for me, either!

Is it possible to hold off on a social life until social skills are in place? I don't think so. But how do you maintain a social life for a child with poor (or undeveloped) social skills?





Carnival of Natural Parenting -- Hobo Mama and Code Name: MamaVisit Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:


  • Sibling Revelry — At Natural Parents Network, Amy W. shares her joy in witnessing the growth of the friendship between her two young children.
  • Making New Mama Friends — Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama muses on how she was able to connect with like-minded mamas and form deep friendships both in 'real life' and online. Learn how these life-long friendships, both between Jennifer and other mothers but also between Jennifer's daughter and the other children, formed and flourished.
  • Family, Friends and Family Friends — Vidya Sury at Vidya Sury, Going A-Musing, Collecting Smiles is reflecting on family friendships, past and present.
  • Arranging friendships in a modern world — From a free-range childhood to current parenthood, how can an introvert like Lauren at Hobo Mama navigate the newly complicated scheduling of playdates and mom friends?
  • Mommy Blogs: Where Moms Make Friends — Mothers make friends with other mothers in new ways. The options from earlier decades remain, but new avenues have sprung up with mommy bloggers. Laurie Hollman, Ph.D. at Parental Intelligence shares her thoughts.
  • Friendship and Sacrifice: Guardians of the Galaxy — Shay at 4HisGlory learned that friendship lessons can be found in unlikely places, like blockbuster summer movies.
  • Friendship - Finding, Forming, Keeping, and WishingLife Breath Present's thoughts on finding, forming, keeping, and wishing for friendships as an introvert.

  • Consciously Creating My Community: Monthly Dinners — How have you intentionally created community? Dionna at Code Name: Mama's goal for the year is to cultivate community. One way she's done that is to help organize two different monthly dinners with friends.
  • Adults need imaginary friends, too — Tat at Mum in Search shares why it's a good idea for adults to have imaginary friends. You get to meet Tat's friend and download a playbook to create your own.
  • Friends Near, Friends Far — Kellie at Our Mindful Life helps her kids keep in touch with friends 600 miles apart.
  • Which comes first, social skills or social life? — Jorje of Momma Jorje frets about whether her daughter can learn social skills without experience, but how to get good experience without social skills.
  • Snail Mail Revival — Skype isn't the only way to stay in touch with long distance friends, That Mama Gretchen and her family are breaking out the envelopes and stamps these days!
  • Montessori-Inspired Friendship Activities — Deb Chitwood at Living Montessori Now shares a roundup of Montessori-inspired friendship activities for home or classroom.
  • How I used the internet to make local friends — After years of striking out at the park, Crunchy Con Mom finally found some great local friends . . . online!
  • My How Friends Change — Erica at ChildOrganics knows entirely too much about how to comfort a friend after a loss.

Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Mamatography 2014 - Week 31

Day 208 - Sunday - July 27



We met with our local Down Syndrome group of prenatal to 3 at a cool splash pad.
Spencer is practicing his new sign: water!

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