Sunday, February 26, 2012

I Am Not a Perfect Natural Parent

Welcome to the "I'm a Natural Parent - BUT..." Carnival

This post was written for inclusion in the carnival hosted by The Artful Mama and Natural Parents Network. During this carnival our participants have focused on the many different forms and shapes Natural Parenting can take in our community.


All too often, blogging moms can appear to be the picture of perfection. I hope you get a more balanced view of me here, since I do tend to share the uglier side of things as well. Still, this sounded like a fun carnival, especially since I've enjoyed chats with this same topic among my NP friends. So...

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I'm a Natural Parent, but...

We eat at McDonalds. In fact, my daughter loves french fries. Aside from cookies, I think they're her absolute favorite food!

We have at least one television (if not three!) turned on all. day. long. I don't like it this way, and it isn't all me. I'm not sure how to make it change, either, especially since Daddy loves him some TV (for PS3 games or NetFlix or whatever).

My husband smokes. I always feel like this is a dark, ugly secret for our family when it comes to my AP / NP friends. Yes, he smokes. No, he does not smoke in our home, but he used to. In fact, he recently switched to smoking eCigs most of the time. They don't smoke, so he can "smoke" them anywhere.

I exclusively used disposable diapers with Sasha. By the time I considered actually using cloth diapers, it was nearly too late and I couldn't afford the start up cost anyway. I'm very thankful to my NP friends for throwing me a surprise cloth baby shower, without which I would still be using disposables for Spencer.

Sasha sits in a car seat facing forward. I didn't hear of staying rear facing until we'd already turned her and I don't have any plans to switch her back. We'll probably leave Spencer rear facing for longer, but it depends on his car seat and how it can fit into our truck.

I really hesitate to share this one, but... I'm addicted to NesQuik! I remember reading something that maybe there was some false information that lead to the boycott, but really... I'm not making a political statement. I just love the stuff!

I almost never do crafts and I nearly obsess over mess when I do let my kids do any crafts.

I carry a "car seat bucket." I don't leave Spencer in it for long, but he is a Winter baby, dang it, and its easier to keep him warm in there.

I hope you don't think less of me. Some of these things do bring me a little guilt, but most of them are just the way I do things. I've certainly gone through times when I didn't want to admit things to my NP friends. I have since learned that they are an amazingly tolerant and understanding bunch... nonjudgmental, that is the word! They're supportive. Gotta love this here blogosphere when you can find a supportive community!

What parenting choices or other imperfections would you like to get off your chest?


I'm a Natural Parent — But … Blog CarnivalThis carnival was created by The Artful Mama and Natural Parents Network. We recognize that "natural parenting" means different things to different families, and we are dedicated to providing a safe place for all families, regardless of where they are in their parenting journeys.

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:


  1. Great post!! I promise I will never judge or think less of you. You are one of the awesomist rockin crunchy mamas I know! I admire you a lot!

    P.S. Is awesomist even a word? lol

  2. Good for your hubby for switching to ecigs!! And FTR, I'm using the bucket much more with Ailia - with Kieran I could climb in the back and put him in the wrap, but that is next to impossible with two car seats in our car. So the bucket it is - until we get inside :)

  3. Baz was a winter baby, too, and tucking him into the car seat bucket with a blanket around him was MUCH better than wearing him out to the car and then transferring him in the rain. I do not blame you - that's smart!

    And I didn't even think of what Dionna is mentioning - there will be even more bucket use with Rerun. Two kids and the loading/unloading of the car freaks me out a little.

  4. I never had a "bucket" car seat, but I can definitely see the appeal, especially when the weather is wet or the baby has fallen asleep in the car. Kudos to you for sharing your "dirty" little non-NP secrets. You're still awesome and crunchy in my book!

  5. Moira love french fries too. We have had a LOT of conversations about why we can't have them for every meal.

  6. I am glad for this carnival. Glad we don't need to keep these confessions to the dark of night in a private chat. Glad that we can all just be honest!

  7. I think bucket seats were ment for winter babies! I loved mine because it kept the kids warm and toasty going from the car to where ever and for sleeping babies... well, NEVER wake a sleeping baby!

  8. Im so glad we all got to confess our NL sins. :)

  9. Great confessions! I have a hard time with messy crafts in my home too which is why we take full advantage of the drop-in art studio classes in our city. Glitter is especially forbidden in my home-- so I am happy to pay a fee for the kids to play with glitter, etc. elsewhere!

    -Kerry @ City Kids Homeschooling

  10. I love crafting but the mess it causes makes me groan so I keep them to a minimum myself. Group crafting opportunities in playgroups once a week at different friend's houses is how we get by. We also use all sorts of unnatural supplies (as well as natural ones too though)that make it seem not so crunchy but the kids love them! My son also loves fries but we avoid McD's because I personally find it too toxic but we stop by the chip stand locally to get our fix from time to time. Everything in moderation!

  11. This carnival is great! I keep reading about things that I didn't know to be as PaceFamilyGirl says, "sins" of natural parenting. Thanks for the peek into your natural parenting ways!

  12. My husband smokes too and it just chaps my hide since I try to keep chemicals to a minimum. Uggg...but nicotine is POWERFUL! I need to get him to convert to those smokeless devices. Thanks for the honesty, especially on the smoking. I tend to leave that point out of conversation as well!

  13. I always appreciate your honesty, Jorje. I like how authentic and open you are in general, it is one of my favourite things about you. =)

  14. Abbey loves french fries, too :) And my husband has smoked (still smokes cigars, on the back porch) before. We also turned Abbey's carseat around before we knew that it'd be safer to keep her rear facing for as long as possible, and I'm butting heads a little with the Hubs about not turning Joe around until he's, like, Abbey's age. Thanks for the honesty. Lots of love! <3

  15. I only nursed my son for 6 weeks. I really didn't want to give it up, but it really was the right choice for my family at the time. He is almost a year old now & is the picture of health, but I still have the occasional bout of fairly serious guilt. I know all about breastfeeding & had planned on nursing my son until he was at least a year, but it just didn't work for us. I nearly shattered into a billion pieces when it came down to making the choice & I second guess myself at least twice a week. I wish like hell that I'd stuck with it, but it really was the best choice for my family at the time. My monkey is a perfect little man & that really is all that ultimately matters. Hopefully the next Bean & I will have a better time of it.

    1. I totally understand! I am dealing with a lot of guilt as I nudge my 2yo toward weaning. I had always planned to let her lead the way.


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